Kuttappanum Tomachanum - Part 2

“Vinesh how much does it cost for an air gun”

“Are you looking for Russian or German?” Vinesh asks Kuttappan ( as if he is a full time arms dealer).

“I don’t know. But it should be good. What’s the difference between those two Vinesh?”

Vinesh thought for a while and said “German guns sometime use pre-compressed air as the source of energy to propel the projectile”

“So???”

“Hmmm…Don’t ask me silly unwanted questions, Kuttappa”

“So can you get me a German Gun?”

“No”

“So what about Russian?”

“I only know that you can get them from Russia, Uzbekistan and Azerbaijan”

“Can you get me a simple air gun?”

“Ok. But it may cost you some money”

And finally for some undisclosed amount of money, Vinesh brought Kuttappan an air gun.

The deal made both Kuttappan and Vinesh happy. Vinesh was able to get rid of an old gun from his friend’s house and was able to treat his friends at a local bar for 1 whole week!!!
Ratish who was there with Vinesh asked him “Where did you get this much money”
“Aa Kuttapane veendum pattichu!” (I fooled Kuttappan once again!)

Kuttapan was overjoyed when he saw his own air gun. But still he had a problem. Being a perfectionist, he wanted to get himself dressed as a hunter. He browsed through some images and photos of a few famous hunters and then got himself a dress.

Next day he wanted to kill the cat. Early morning he got himself dressed and took the gun and went in search of the cat.

His sister saw him in that uniform and asked her mother “Amme, kuttaapaan enthinaa Shikari Shambu ine poole nadakunne? Collegil fancy dress competition undo? (Mother, why is Kuttpan walking like Shikari Shambu? Is there any fancy dress competition in his college?).

Kuttapan heard that and wanted to react. But he remembered that he was on an important mission and should not be disturbed by other thoughts.

Kuttapan found Tomachan sleeping on top of the wall. He took the gun, made sure that it is loaded, took the aim and pulled the trigger. Only one spring jumped out of the gun with some sound and not the pellet and it fell down near Kuttappan .

Hearing all these noise Tomachan woke up, stretched himself and stared at Kuttapan as if to say “Evan enne manasamadhaanamaayi uragaanum samathikille?”(Will this guy ever let me sleep in peace?) and left the place.

Kuttappanum Tomachanum - Part 1

“Tomaacha…... come here and sit” Kuttapan called his pet cat. Kuttappan got this cat as a present when he passed out of his school with flying colors. Since he was an ardent fan of “Tom and Jerry” cartoons, he named his cat – Tomachan.

Within a few days they became thick buddies. Tomachan would wait anxiously for Kuttappan to reach home so they can have food together. Things went on well for a few months until the day Tomachan did the biggest mistake in his life.

Kuttappan was an ardent fan of Bill Gates and his products. He waited for months together to see the launch of Windows XP and get his hands on it. One fine day his uncle brought him the much awaited XP CD and Kuttappan was delighted. He called up a few of his friends and told them about the additional features of XP over other operating systems. A few people like Ritu and Priya congratulated Kuttappan without even knowing what he was talking about. Before installing it in his computer, he took it to Tomachan and opened it and showed the CD. But just then Kuttappan had a call from one of his friends Santhosh who called to enquire about Kuttappan’s health thinking that Windows XP was an epidemic.

Kuttappan convinced Santhosh that he was not a victim of any disease and went back to his room and got the shock of his life. Tomachan was smiling at Kuttapan and while scratching the XP CD. Kuttapan got violent and kicked Tomachan out of the room. He tried installing it in his computer but the CD wouldn’t work. He was devastated.

Finally Kuttappan decided to call up his best friend Vinesh for help.

PD Kathakal - First Valentines Day Gift

On the Valentines Day just after his marriage, Mr PD decided to be quite romantic and went to a shop in the morning to buy a gift. Since it was their first Valentines Day he wanted something that would surprise his wife and give himself a good image booster.

But he wasn’t quite sure as to what to buy. He thought for sometime…… How about some Chocolates??(Well he buys them whenever he has a fight with his wife), then how about a diamond ring?? (He didn’t have to think about that too long as he knew that its expensive). Then suddenly he remembered TEDDY BEAR!!!!!! (His wife loves teddy bears)

PD to the shopkeeper: “Do you have teddy bears?”

Shopkeeper: “Yes Sir, its there in the first Floor”

PD goes there and checks the teddy bears. Well everything was costing somewhere between Rs.500/- to Rs.3000/-. Just then PD attention was diverted towards a big monkey in that bunch.

Out of sheer curiosity PD asks the shopkeeper “How much for that monkey?”

Shopkeeper replies: “It’s not a monkey. That’s a mirror!!!!”

PD Kathakal - Dance Pe Chance

Tears rolled down from his eyes as he stepped on to the dais to receive the award. Not one, but three!!!. It was the annual day celebrations at the quarters where my friend PD (Suresh P D) was staying. He remembered the days when his previous boss Ashok Nair would call him and give the increment letter, but an award?? He did not have a speech prepared for the audience as the last time he got an award was when he was studying in 2nd Std, that too 2nd prize for frog jumping.

The annual celebrations got off to a colorful start on Thursday 22nd March 2007, 6.30 pm at Vazhuthacaud, Trivandrum. The initial speeches bored PD a bit, but the girls in the audience inspired him more. The cultural activities started with folk dance by some inmates of the quarters. But as soon as the next announcement came, the audience had a shock of their life like the one as you too are going to have.

"Calling Suresh PD and his wife to the stage for presenting the Gujarathi Dandiya dance". PD and his wife were dressed in the traditional Gujarathi attire (remember “Doli Taro” in Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam). Both of them danced to the tunes of the gujarathi hit number "Gujju Gujju hoi hoi..Ganja Ganja Boi Boi..". The so-called dance lasted for 3:26 min and the audience were spellbound by the mezmerizing performance and even forgot to applaud when it was over. It was later learned that PD and his wife had practiced this dance for 3 weeks before the show.

PD went to the dais and took the awards for the best costume, best couple, and for the best dance steps!!!